Friday, September 30, 2005

Typical

The new fiscal year for the Federal government starts tomorrow. Why October 1 is beyond me. Anyway, for the ninth year in a row, the House of Representatives has failed to pass a budget before the start of the fiscal year. No worries. They've passed a stop gap bill that will ensure that government is funded and won't have to shut down tomorrow. One little problem. The stop gap bill funds almost everything at current levels. The big exception? State block grants. This is money given out to states to help the very poorest of the poor. Those block grants have been cut by ~50%. And the House? They're off on a break. Now when the Schiavo case was big news, members of the House came back en masse from their break. In this case, which affects millions of people living so far below the poverty line that reaching that line is a pipe dream? The House has gone on a break.

What's the odds the members of the House give themselves a big fat pay raise this year?

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Skipping


This morning my five year old daughter told me I'm not very good at skipping.

Oh well. I'll survive.

I'm still basking in the comparison of scientists to rock stars.

I should give Bono a call.

Maybe he knows how to skip.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

You think science is boring? Think again.


"[Scientists] are people who by definition live outside the norm,... floating in zones that have never been reached before,... people with strong egos and God complexes.
That sounds like rock 'n roll to me."
-Publisher Bob Guccione Jr. last week in The New York Times


Well there you go. Spot on. Except the bit about God complexes. Honest.

Friday, September 23, 2005

We suck

God help you if you're poor, sick and/or elderly in the US.

No one else will.

Were the Flying Circus crew prescient?

Spam - Monty Python


Customer:
Morning.

Waitress:
Morning.

Customer:
What have you got?

Waitress:
Well, there's egg and bacon,
egg sausage and bacon
Egg and spam
Egg, bacon and spam
Egg, bacon, sausage and spam
Spam, bacon, sausage and spam
Spam, egg, spam, spam, bacon and spam
Spam, sausage, spam, spam, spam, bacon, spam tomato and spam
Spam, spam, spam, egg and spam
Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, spam and spam.

(Choir: Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Lovely Spam! Lovely Spam!)

Or Lobster Thermidor aux crevettes with a mornay sauce
served in a provencale manner with shallots and aubergines
garnished with truffle pate, brandy and a fried egg on top and spam.

Wife:
Have you got anything without spam?

Waitress:
Well, the spam, eggs, sausage and spam
That's not got much spam in it

Wife:
I don't want any spam!

Customer:
Why can't she have eggs, bacon, spam and sausage?

Wife:
That's got spam in it!

Customer:
Hasn't got much spam in it as spam, eggs, sausage and spam has it?

(Choir: Spam! Spam! Spam!...)

Wife:
Could you do me eggs, bacon, spam and sausage without the spam, then?

Waitress:
Iiiiiiiiiiiich!!

Wife:
What do you mean 'Iiiiiiiiiich'? I don't like spam!

(Choir: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!)

Waitress (to choir):
Shut up!

(Choir: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!)

Waitress:
Shut Up! Bloody Vikings!
You can't have egg, bacon, spam and sausage without the spam.

Wife:
I don't like spam!

Customer:
Shush dear, don't have a fuss. I'll have your spam. I love it,
I'm having spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans,
spam, spam, spam, and spam!

(Choir: Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!)

Waitress:
Shut Up!! Baked beans are off.

Customer:
Well, could I have her spam instead of the baked beans then?

Waitress:
You mean spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam,
spam and spam?

Choir (intervening):
Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam!
Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!
Spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam.
Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam!
Spam spam spam spam!


I don't get spam. Well, yes, I get spam, lots of it. Just like anyone else who's had an email account for more than about 10 milliseconds. What I don't get is the rationale used by spammers. Just this morning I log into my email account and there, amongst many other spam emails, are no less than five from five different addresses all offering me the same "Genuine S W I S S R O L E X watches!" That's just one example. I get lots of the same spam over and over and over. What's with that? Do they think they can eventually wear me down? Do they honestly believe that one day I'm just going to throw my arms up, and credit card number out (on the Internet) and get myself a genuine Swiss Rolex low interest mortgage from an off-shore pharmacy that guarantees the Windows operating system they're sending me will increase the size of my penis, give me longer erections and help the widow of a Nigerian government official transfer millions of dollars into my bank account because, gosh darn it, I'm just so special?

Maybe.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

So now I have my own blog...

What to do with it? Let me think...